We finally got approved this week!
All our paperwork is in, our case has been reviewed, and we are approved. We are so excited! In a nutshell, this is the process we've completed thus far:
First, I had to make a very difficult first phone call to LDS Family Services. It felt so awkward and I wasn't sure what to say or how to get started in all this. The conversation went something like this..."Um, hi. I'm interested in adopting." A nice-sounding lady replies, "Okay, can I get your name please?....What agency will you be going to?....Are you interested in adopting a baby?" I'm thinking, uh yeah, what other kinds of things can you adopt? It was weird, I was almost expecting the next set of questions to be, "What color would you like? What size? What kind? Would you like anything else with that?" It was weird. But, she took down my address and sent me the application packet. Here's a step-by-step of what happened next:
-Attend orientation.
-Fill out application and choose references. (This part of the paperwork is basic info and official documents, not hard, but a little time-consuming)
-Get an assigned caseworker. (Our caseworker is awesome, so helpful and understanding. She is really great.)
-Intake appointment as a couple. Receive more paperwork to be filled out and pay the application fee.
-Background checks.
-Fill out paperwork and lots of online forms. (This is the part where I began to feel like these people I just met know everything about me. It's like standing under a ridiculously huge magnifying glass. It's hard not to feel a little angry. Why don't all parents have to undergo this sort of scrutiny before being allowed to have children? This part of the paperwork is hard, emotional, and very time-consuming.)
-Individual interviews.
-Education classes.
-Home visit. (I was so stressed about this, making sure the house was immaculately clean, removing every potential hazard from 4 feet and below. It actually was very brief and very easy.)
-Write birthparent letter and create a collage of family photos. (I think the birthparent letter was the hardest thing for me to write out of all the paperwork. Very intimidating and a little awkward.)
-Work on online profile.
-Caseworker writes our adoptive study and presents it to the adoption committee for approval.
-Caseworker approves our online profile and gets it published on the Internet.
That is a very condensed version. It feels a little weird to have it all done. All this time, we've been working towards getting it all done and approved and now, I feel like I'm waiting for them to tell me what to do next. Where's the next set of forms and interviews? It has been so good for me to have something tangible to be doing, working towards something. I feel a little lost at the moment, still very excited, but also a little nervous about knowing our profile is out there circulating among birth moms.
So now we wait.
But, we don't want to just sit back and wait. Lots and lots of adoptions happen now through designated adoptions, through someone who knows someone, a third party who knows the adoptive couple and knows or knows of the birth mom. Can you see where I am going with this? Here is our plea... Please be our network. Let people know that you know a couple who is trying to adopt (you can add in how great you think we are, of course) and you may find someone who has a friend or a daughter, etc who is considering adoption. If you become aware of a birth mother who is looking to place her child for adoption, please let her know about us. If she is willing to consider us, please let us know and we can have you give her our caseworker's information so she can find out more about us. There is no telling how we will get connected with the right birth mom, but we are praying for it to happen and doing our best to find her.
Please keep us in your prayers.
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7 comments:
Is it okay if it is out of state?? I will definately keep my eyes and ears open. Good luck. Congrats!
I was so excited to look on It's About Love the other day and find your profile was up! Awesome! It looks so great. You did a really great job with it. I actually had a dream a while ago that one of my young women was pregnant and I told her about you- it was a pretty crazy dream, but I will definitely keep my eyes open for such an opportunity! (My sweet little 13-year-old Jenny would freak if she knew about that dream!)
WOW! That is a lot to get done but I am so glad you are approved and now is the long wait! I will definetly keep my ears and eyes open for you. You are a WONDERFUL mother and I am so excited for you and your family! I am going to look at your profile right now!
Love ya!
PS. I just looked at your profile and it is amazing! I love the family pictures you have on there. What you wrote to the birth parents was beautiful and I got the chills just reading your whole profile! YOu are amazing and I am praying for you! Love ya!
What an emotional roller coaster! I am so glad that you've been approved. Your blog is so cute. We're did you find this layout/background?
brooke I am so excited for you and your family! You deserve it. I am glad that you posted everything before that too. I can't imagine how much you have had to grow through everything. Keep us posted and let me know if you need anything?
It is definitely okay if it is out of state.
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